What Do Parents Need?
As parents, we often think about the needs of our children, our spouse or significant other, our pets, our jobs, our civic responsibility, and more. The list of meeting others’ needs seems endless! This month’s article deals with our needs as parents. Of course, our children did not come with instructional booklets when we left the hospital so we must do the best we can to become competent parents.
So, the question is, what do parents need? My first response is the love of our children. As parents, we need to feel that love. We’ve bore them, nursed and fed them, cared for their every need from babyhood and beyond. We’ve invested time, life, and love in their upbringing. We long for their smiles, hugs, and kisses in response. The displays of affection we share with our kids is the “stuff” of life.
Another important need parents have is support and encouragement. My job as a parent educator has taught me that parents need to know that what we’re doing is important work. We need to feel valued by society, family and friends. We need to know that we are not alone and that others are going through the same struggles with their children. Also, a need that goes hand-in-hand with support is education. I don’t know any parent that doesn’t need help from time to time. Whether it be feeding an infant or dealing with toilet learning, helpful information from books, articles, ECFE classes, and other parents can be a lifeline!
In the hustle and bustle of being parents and attending to our children’s needs, we often neglect ourselves. What we so often need as parents is time to attend to our own needs. We need time to relax, time to be alone, and time for our own hobbies or pursuits. We need time to rediscover who we are. This time is necessary not only for our own sanity but to serve as a model for our children. Once we have had this time, we can come back to the job of parenting with a fresh outlook. We can enjoy our children and look forward to their many wonderful stages of growth and development.
Jill Phillips
ECFE Parent Educator